Being a PhD student is not easy. Navigating the highly competitive world of academia while working hard for little or no pay would be stressful for anyone—but it’s especially challenging for graduate students who are also parents.
 
Featuring contributions from more than forty current and former graduate students raising children, Parenting While PhDing offers valuable advice for students and administrators. Parents will get practical recommendations on both child care and self-care, learning how to form supportive personal and professional networks while establishing a healthy work/life balance. The collection also offers thoughtful suggestions on how to make graduate programs less toxic and more inclusive.
 
Recognizing that not all graduate students have similar backgrounds or needs, Parenting While PhDing features a diverse range of viewpoints, including queer, trans, disabled, BIPOC, immigrant, and first-generation college students. The authors represent a variety of disciplines, from the natural and social sciences to the humanities and health care professions. Together, they share fresh perspectives on the experiences of graduate students with children and offer strategies they can use to navigate the dual pressures of the academy and parenting.

JACKIE HOERMANN-ELLIOTT is an associate professor of English at Texas Woman’s University in Denton, Texas, where she serves as the director of first-year writing. She is the author of Running, Thinking, Writing: Embodied Cognition in Composition.
 
JENNA MORTON-AIKEN is a lecturer in English at Brown University in Providence, Rhode Island, where she serves as senior associate director for writing and English language support.

Foreword by Caroline Grant
Change the Conversation: An Introduction, Jackie Hoermann-Elliott and Jenna Morton-Aiken
 
Part 1: Stay Alive
Chapter 1: Embrace the Multiplicities: How Internarrative Identity Theory Transformed My PhD Journey, Judith Chriqui Benchimol
Chapter 2: Leverage Your Assets: How Parenting Shapes (and Benefits) Our Scholarly Identities, Jennifer C. Judd, Whitney Zahar Rich, and Alicia C. Beretta
Chapter 3: Be Your Own Advocate: Prioritizing Self as a Pregnant PhD Student, Elizabeth M. Williams
Chapter 4: This Too Shall Pass: Strategies for Mothering While Studying as a Distance-Learning Graduate Student, Elise A. Green
Chapter 5: Just Be Okay: A Reflection on Pandemic Parenting, Burnout, and Healing, Emily Gresbrink
Chapter 6: Speak Out: Dismantling Master Narratives and Toxic Work Culture, Keith Jackson
Chapter 7: Send Away the Cucuy: One Mom’s Journey Through Graduate School While Battling False Expectations, Karen Tellez-Trujillo
Chapter 8: Orale! Apply and Earn Tu Degree: Parenting While a (Chicana!) Doctoral Student, Dalel Serda
Chapter 9: Stay Alive: A Black Mother’s Responsibility to Ride Grief’s Hills and Live, Lisa E. Wright
 
Part 2: Your Body Has Other Plans
Chapter 10: “A Lot of Us Can Swim”: One Queer Student’s Advice for Mentoring Pregnant and Parenting Graduate Students, Rachael Jordan
Chapter 11: Expect the Unexpected: Navigating the Early Dilemmas of Becoming a Graduate Student Parent, Laura Fitzwater Gonzalez
Chapter 12: Do Have Kids in Graduate School: Resisting Chilly Advice and Treatment in Graduate School for Prospective Parents, Natasha Trace Robinson
Chapter 13: “Send Those Damned Emails”: Experiences and Advice from My Premature Birth, Tiffani K. Tijerina
Chapter 14: Don’t Divide Yourself: Building Hybrid Work Practices to Reconcile the Competing Identities of Graduate-Student Parents, Jennifer Burke Reifman
Chapter 15: Your Body has Other Plans: Finding Support and Forgiveness for Morning Sickness, Kathryn Lafferty-Danner
 
Part 3: Juggle What Matters
Chapter 16: “Go to F*cking Disney World”: Establishing a Work/Life Balance and Learning When to Say “No”, James B. Harr, III
Chapter 17: Cobble Together the Village: Securing Childcare as Graduate Student Parents, Calvin Olsen
Chapter 18: The World Won’t Pause: What to Expect When Co-Navigating the Academic and Professional Job Market with a Newborn, Daniel Henke and Erin Henke
Chapter 19: Reframe the Narrative: A Conversation on Navigating Childcare in a PhD Program, Camila Ring, Brita Thielen, and Hayley Verdi
Chapter 20: Know When to Move: Intentionally Choosing When to Share News of Fostering with Your Committee, Aleashia Walton Valentin
Chapter 21: Find Ways to Shift: Reimagining Labor in the Postpartum Period Amidst the PhD, Courney Lund O’Neill
Chapter 22: Give Yourself a Break: Juggling Rugrats, Experiencing Regrets, April Cobos, Daniel L. Hocutt, and Megan McKittrick
Chapter 23: Create a Toolkit: How we Developed Practices of Care to Survive as First-Gen GTA Parents, Danielle M. Koepke and Gitte Frandsen
Chapter 24: Juggle What Matters: An Autoethnography of a Graduate Student Mom, Educator, and Caretaker, Celeste L. Graham
 
Part 4: Push Back
Chapter 25: You Can be Both: Navigating Complementary not Contradictory Roles as a Conservative Muslim Mother and Academic, Nabila Hijazi
Chapter 26: You Don’t have to Keep Going: Reflections on Navigating Crises and Precarity as an Excluded Scholar, Amie McLean
Chapter 27: Know the Problem Isn’t You: Addressing Systemic Barriers for Parents in PhD Programs, Lourdes Fernandez, Jessica McCaughey, and Rachael Graham Lussos
Chapter 28: Question Normative Tropes: Possibilities for Queer Parenting in Graduate Programs, Beth Buyserie
Chapter 29: Get Rid of the Gauntlet: Redefining a Scientist’s Parenting Experience in Academia, Kristin L. Osborne
Chapter 30: Push Back: Identifying and Handling Retaliation in Order to Stop A Leaky Pipeline, Siham Lekchiri and  Barbara A.W. Eversole
 
Part 5: Leave a Note
Chapter 31: There’s Never a Good Time: Navigating Graduate Medical Education while Pregnant, Stephanie L. Graff, MD
Chapter 32: Things Don’t Always Go According to Plan: Navigating Pregnancy Loss and Challenging the Culture of Silence as a PhD Candidate, Mariya Tseptsura
Chapter 33: Investigate and Invest in Supportive Spaces: Doctoral Programs that Accept and Enhance the Experiences of Graduate Student Parents, Morgan Buchs, Rachel Flynn, Laura Leigh Menard, and Brandie Bohney
Chapter 34: It’s Not All Sunshine and Rainbows: Emotional Labor and Mentoring in the Writing Center, Jennifer Phillips-Denny
Chapter 35: My Place in the Wolfpack: The Importance of Cultivating MyPacks and Providing Student Parents with Opportunities to Belonging, Jacqueline Cerda-Smith
Chapter 36: Race at Your Own Pace: A Story of How Caregiving Sometimes Means Changing Lanes or Start Times in Graduate School, Joan Jiyoung Hwang
Chapter 37: Lean On: Planning for, Insisting On, and Accepting Support, Sara Bartlett Large
Chapter 38: Leave a Note: Powering Through an Academic Job Market as a Breastfeeding Mom, Danielle DeVasto

Closing Thoughts: From Survival to Self-Preservation, Jenna Morton-Aiken

Appendix A
Appendix B
Appendix C
Acknowledgments
Notes on Contributors
Index

Foreword by Caroline Grant xiii
Change the Conversation: An Introduction 1
Jackie Hoermann-Elliott
and
Jenna Morton-Aiken
Part I: Stay Alive
1 Embrace the Multiplicities: How Internarrative Identity
Theory Transformed My PhD Journey 17
Judith Chriqui Benchimol
2 Leverage Your Assets: How Parenting Shapes
(and Benefits) Our Scholarly Identities 22
Jennifer C. Judd, Whitney Zahar Rich, and
Alicia Christine Beretta
3 Be Your Best Advocate: Prioritizing Self as a
Pregnant PhD Student 31
Elizabeth M. Williams
4 This Too Shall
Pass: Strategies for Mothering While
Studying as a Distance-Learning
Graduate
Student 39
Elise A. Green
5 Just Be Okay: A Reflection on Pandemic Parenting,
Burnout, and Healing 47
Emily Gresbrink
6 Keep a Labor
Log: Analyzing Master Narratives about
Time and Toxic Work Culture 56
Keith Jackson
7 Send Away the Cucuy: One Mom’s Journey through
Graduate
School While Battling False Expectations 65
Karen Tellez-Trujillo
8 Órale! Apply and Earn Tu Degree: Parenting While a
(Chicana!) Doctoral Student 74
Dalel Serda
9 Stay Alive: A Black Mother’s
Responsibility to
Ride
Grief ’s Hills and Live 81
Lisa E. Wright
Part II: Your Body Has Other Plans
10 “A Lot of Us Can Swim”: One Queer Student’s
Advice for Mentoring Pregnant and Parenting
Graduate
Students 91
Rachael Jordan
11 Expect the Unexpected: Navigating the Early
Dilemmas of Becoming a Graduate
Student Parent 100
Laura Fitzwater Gonzales
12 Do Have Kids in Graduate
School: Resisting Chilly
Advice to and Treatment of Prospective Parents in
Graduate
School 108
Natasha Trace Robinson
13 Send Those
Damned Emails: Experiences and Advice
from My Premature Delivery 117
Tiffani K. Tijerina
14 Don’t
Divide Yourself: Building Hybrid Work
Practices to Reconcile the Competing Identities
of Graduate
Student Parents 125
Jennifer Burke Reifman
15 Your Body Has Other Plans: Finding Support and
Forgiveness for Morning Sickness 131
Kate Lafferty-Danner
Part III: Juggle What Matters
16 “Go to F-cking
Disney World”: Establishing a
Work-Life
Balance and Learning When to Say No 139
James B. Harr III
17 Cobble Together the Village: Securing Childcare
as Graduate
Student Parents 145
Calvin Olsen
18 The World Won’t
Pause: What to Expect When
Co-Navigating
the Academic and Professional Job
Market with a Newborn 153
Daniel Henke and Erin Henke
19 Reframe the Narrative: A Conversation on Navigating
Childcare in a PhD Program 160
Camila Ring, Brita M. Thielen, and
Hayley E. Verdi
20 Know When to Move: Intentionally Choosing When
to Share News of Fostering with Your Committee 168
Aleashia Walton Valentin
21 Find Ways to Shift: Reimagining Labor
in the
Postpartum Period amid the PhD 177
Courtney Lund O’Neil
22 Give Yourself a Break: Juggling Rugrats, Experiencing
Regrets, and Cultivating Compassionate Community 182
April Cobos, Daniel L. Hocutt, and
Megan L. McKittrick
23 Create a Toolkit: How We Developed Practices of
Care to Survive as First-Gen
GTA Parents 191
Danielle Marie Koepke and Gitte Frandsen
24 Juggle What Matters:
An Autoethnography of a
Graduate
School Mom, Educator, and Caretaker 200
Celeste L. Graham
Part IV: Push Back
25 You Can Be Both: Navigating Complementary, not
Contradictory Roles as a Conservative Muslim Mother
and Academic 209
Nabila Hijazi
26 You Don’t
Have to Keep Going:
Reflections on
Navigating Crises and Precarity as an Excluded Scholar 217
Amie McLean
27 Know the Problem
Isn’t
You: Addressing Systemic
Barriers for Parents in PhD Programs 229
Lourdes Fernandez, Jessica McCaughey,
and Rachael Graham Tin
28 Question Normative Tropes: Possibilities for Queer
Parenting in Graduate
Programs 240
Beth Buyserie
29 Get Rid of the Gauntlet: Redefining a Scientist’s
Parenting Experience in Academia 249
Kristin L. Osborne
30 Push Back: Identifying and Handling
Retaliation in
Order to Stop a Leaky Pipeline 256
Siham Lekchiri and Barbara A. W. Eversole
Part V: Leave a Note
31 There’s
Never a Good Time: Navigating Graduate
Medical Education While Pregnant 267
Stephanie L. Graff
32 Things
Don’t
Always Go According to Plan: Navigating
Pregnancy Loss and Challenging the Culture of
Silence as a PhD Candidate 276
Mariya Tseptsura
33 Investigate and Invest in Supportive Spaces: Doctoral
Programs That Accept and Enhance the Experiences of
Graduate
Student Parents 284
Morgan Buchs, Rachel Flynn, Laura Leigh
Menard, and Brandie Bohney
34 It’s Not All Sunshine and Rainbows: Mentoring
Graduate
Student Parents in the Writing Center 293
Jennifer Phillips-Denny
35 My Place in the Wolfpack: The Importance of
Cultivating MyPacks and Providing Student Parents
with Opportunities to Belong 302
Jacqueline Cerda-Smith
36 Race at Your Own Pace: A Story of How Caregiving
Sometimes Means Changing Lanes or Start Times in
Graduate
School 311
Joan Jiyoung Hwang
37 Lean On: Planning for, Insisting On, and Accepting
Support 319
Sara Bartlett Large
38 Leave a Note: Powering through an Academic Job
Market As a Breastfeeding Mom 330
Danielle DeVasto
Closing Thoughts: From Survival to Self-Preservation
337
Jenna Morton-Aiken
Appendix A: Jenna’s Self-Preservation
Toolkit 343
Appendix B: Out-of-
Office
Replies from
Stephanie Graff, MD 348
Appendix C: Labor
Log Template from Keith Jackson 351
Acknowledgments
353
Notes on Contributors 355
Index 000